why am i here?

Two weeks into my Yellowstone adventure and five weeks since I left home, I have frequently considered why I am here. I've concluded it is because of my dad.

As a young child, I followed him whenever I could. He was a hard worker and had a keen wit. He also praised children for their work and there was always work for everyone on a tobacco farm. His tasks were more interesting to me than my mother's work because his was outdoors. While mother did work hard on the farm too, she was primarily responsible for the meals and the running of the household. I never cared for housework. Since I was always tagging along with my dad whenever he'd let me, he began introducing me and my siblings by saying, "I have one son, one daughter and one tomboy." That established my difference at a very young age and I liked it.

Daddy did not divide work according to gender.... at least in my case. I was the baby, so perhaps I wasn't as good at standing all day handing three leaves at a time to a stringer (Miss Claude) who always nudged me to hurry up. So, I was expendable in the barn workforce and was given the job of tractor driver. I was young but wanted that praise for a job well done, so I did everything I could to get the slides of tobacco safely from field to barn without turning them over in the BIG mud holes on the way. This has influenced my resistance to labeling any work by gender. If I want to do it and I can find a way to do it, I will. Why should I not do a task because it is labeled "men's work"? I don't particularly like being considered eccentric, but I think this is a foolish division.

Another thing he said about me, "If you want her to do something, tell her she can't do it." I don't know if he was recognizing an innate trait or if his saying that was a self-fulfilling prophecy, but I have loved a challenge all my life.

So, here I am in Yellowstone National Park for five months. I find myself in the company of many others of all ages from across the country as well as other countries. It is amazing to be with this mix of people who are all here for the adventure. I sit in the employee dining room (enjoying every meal, whatever is offered, because I don't have to cook or clean up after!) I sit wherever there is a seat and immediately a conversation begins with hi, what's your name, where are you from, is this your first season (many answer no, 5th, 20th, etc.). There is something about being here that eliminates barriers of age, size, gender and background. People who are shunned in many settings are welcomed to the table here. No judgement, much camaraderie, loud conversation and good fun. Much comparison of what we have seen, especially animals and where they were. I reported at dinner the day I saw a moose and the next morning met a dorm mate who was headed out to the area to try to see it. We all share a love for this place and a sense of wonder that we are here.

Have not heard one conversation about religion or politics or running down another person. Not sure it gets better than that!

Everything I've heard about my work place, reservations, is positive. There is no pressure to sell, though we are considered salespeople. It's all about helping the "guests" find the experience they want to have in Yellowstone. The supervisors are there to help you help the guest, not to catch you in errors. May be the best work situation anywhere.....especially considering that we all get to live here for the season.

To many people back home, I am a brave woman to drive west alone and work in Yellowstone for the summer. To everyone here, I am simply another person to get to know who is doing what they are doing. Nothing novel about it. Everyone here is exploding some myth about what someone their age or gender or other divisive label should do.

Gotta love being here! Thank you Daddy for those life affecting comments! I appreciate being uniquely me more than ever.

Thanks for your company!

Elizabeth

A Stick Shift Life

The simple act of changing gears may not seem to be a major issue in the determination of enjoyable driving (or a good life), either you drive straight gear or automatic. While you need to pay attention in either, an automatic life seems to imply ease and comfort. However, in my experience, driving a stick shift changes the act from passive to active involvement. Active is always better. Knowing how to drive a stick shift enhances self-confidence. Besides, you never know when the opportunity or need will arise to use that skill. Driving a stick shift provides a sense of power and exhilaration. Certainly provides and requires a reasonable amount of control too. So, active involvement, self-confidence, power, exhilaration and reasoned control, all these are useful assets for everyday living.

Stick shift living implies a "do it myself" attitude which comes with an interest, or actually an intrigue, about how to accomplish tasks. This make-it happen-posture shows up in everything, from simple tasks such as stacking firewood to mental ponderings about how to build a small addition I need. Not that I would build it myself, but I do like trying to figure out how I would go about it if I did. I especially relish the challenge of how to do something new. Most tasks simply require a willingness to work once you get it figured out and gather the tools and materials. Fortunately, I am overly gifted with willingness to work.

A stick shift life requires resisting and rejecting generalizations and especially role assignments. Women are people....as are men, short and tall, black and "white" and mixed race too, straights and gays, young and old...and any other labels you choose. Work does not have a gender. "Women's work" can be anything that doesn't require brute strength or (in my case) being tall. Why is driving a tractor any different than driving a car or truck (it's not except for the added equipment & operating that can be learned too). As a feminine (though not prissy) woman, I have mowed, raked and baled hay, ran a mixer/grinder to make cow feed, and as I told grandson 1 recently, I can drive anything (haven't of course, but figure I could). As an old woman, I have learned to kayak, wasn't hard since I have a sit-on, inflatable kayak ... hardest thing about it is inflating it with a rechargable pump, not hard! I have paddled some beautiful rivers & lakes alone and love it! Society's pressure to conform is heavy and pervasive. When I was a child, girls were still told to be ladylike. I was a "tomboy" meaning I preferred any outdoor activity to being inside. Being inside often meant doing housework (washing dishes! blah!) or learning to sew. Nothing inside was as much fun as hanging upside down from the apple tree limb. So, the sitting still and being ladylike did not come easy for me. As a young mom, responsible for the care and feeding of the children as well as the cows and horses, I enjoyed being female AND doing the manual work required in both these roles. Role assignments are limiting and far too narrow to account for individual traits and talents. Who decides which category a task falls in? What does it matter the gender (or other divisive role) of the person who is there and willing and able to take care of what needs to be done? A stick shift life has no room for role assignments.

Naturally, the main component in living a stick shift life is the ability to change gears. Change is often surprising or even shocking. It is also inescapable throughout life. No matter how we try to avoid it, change happens. Adapting to events in life is the true test of success. How we adjust to what happens to us is more important than our title, how much money we have, or where we live. While some change tests the ability (or even the desire) to live beyond the event, even the most devastating change is more readily survived in a stick shift life.

The rewards of living a stick shift life are immeasurable. Rejecting imposed limitations and self-limitations sets you free to explore the amazing possibilities life offers. One of the most rewarding aspects of a stick shift life is the pleasure of completing a daunting task or accomplishing a personal goal. Add that to active involvement, self-confidence, power, exhilaration and control and you have a joyous stick-shift life.

Thanks for your company!

Elizabeth

Prologue

"What a pleasant life might be had in this world by a handsome, sensible old lady of good fortune, blessed with a sound constitution and a firm will!"

Jane Austen

Day one of the blog of an atypical 68 year old woman, or I like to think so. Grew up on NC tobacco farm, mom to 2, enrolled in college at age 43, earned UVA Ph.D. at age 59, grandma to 3, retired from university as assistant professor, travel, paint, garden and into many creative interests. Impetus for blogging is my summer plans. If you follow along, you'll read my take on "everything."

I paint, some of my work is posted on my web site: www.elizabethtuttle.com You can be sure that whatever I'm current working on will appear on this blog.

Status today, there is almost 2 feet of snow on the ground, but sun is shining through blue skies. A chair with an almost finished new caned bottom is waiting for me to complete the last of 7 passes. Painting has been on hold for a couple of weeks, so I'm pulled back to it. However, I've just finished a quilt for grandson 2 and have jumped into another. Am repairing an old ragged quilt my grandmother made and decided to make a new top to repair one side of an also ragged quilt my mother made. The "dining room" is a disaster, but there's no one but me to care and I don't much. 

Having a creative bent is fun.....BUT! I am confounded by my creative impulses. Constantly drawn by new works or projects or just new challenges, I dither about often with lots of energy but not able or wiliing to focus on one project very long. Is that creative energy or just ADHD? Works for me wonderfully OR paralyzes me.  I need at least 4 of me to get what I want to do done.

The woodstove has warmed things up, so time to get to work.

Thanks for your company! Elizabeth